Thursday, August 14, 2008

Nail Head

i was over at Low Carb Friends this morning, when I came across a post that a woman named Hanlie made. I will quote it here, (I hope she doesn't mind)

"This post is not about weight or dieting. It's about becoming SANE and NORMAL.

Because I honestly used to think that there was something terribly wrong with me. I had this terrible shameful secret that was ruining my life and, despite being good at most other things, I just could not master this. I was fat for 9 years and tried for 9 years, unsucessfully, to lose weight. I joined several diet support groups, I bought every diet on the market, I even had therapy for compulsive eating.

When I think back I feel so sad for the person I used to be.

My whole life and every waking thought used to be consumed by food and bingeing. I would have breakfast at home, then again at work. I would go out during my lunch hour to get 2 take-aways. One I would eat at the restaurant or walking back to work, the other in front of my colleagues. I would stop at a fast food chain on the way home and then have dinner with my boyfriend again later. And in between I had a steady supply of snacks in my drawer at work - small things that were easy to stuff into my mouth when nobody was looking and quick to swallow in case the phone should ring - it was that calculated.

If I was planning a binge and a friend would show up unexpectedly I would feel irritated and nervous and I couldn't wait for them to leave so I could be alone with my food. I want to cry when I think about that now.

And every day I hated myself more and more and got fatter and fatter.

I started Atkins a little over a year ago and lost 50 pounds in 8 months, and have kept it off since then. It was that simple.

Atkins is not just a diet for me. It gave me my life back!"

This blew my mind.
That was me. To a T.

I would do ALL those things. My binging was more out of control than I ever wanted to admit. I always thought that I'd need years of therapy to fix what was wrong with me. I never imagined that simply going low-carb would help me so much.
I've only been doing it for a short time now and I'm already SO much better. My binging and obsessiveness is nearly gone.
I still feel the urge, and the inexplicable draw to food. But its nothing like it was just 3 months ago.

It took Hanlie's post to make me realize what a difference it's made in me.
And this is how I know that, no matter how long it takes.. I will reach goal. My compulsive eating was the biggest factor holding me back for so long... if I can truly curb that, there is no way I won't lose everything I need to.

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